No wonder the UK is in decline: we’ve become a nation of slobs

Dress for the job you want, so the old adage goes. Judging by the parlous state of officewear in this country, I think it fair to say UK PLC is crammed with senior staff desperate for a Saturday shift at J D Sports. Because why else are they wearing trainers? The bosses might be rocking box-fresh white Alexander McQueens in the boardroom – but they’re still trainers, no matter how many hundreds of pounds they may cost.

So is it any wonder that esteemed shoe-polish purveyor Kiwi is pulling the plug on us in exasperation? The global brand is taking its products off our shelves, preferring to sell in countries where smart attire extends beyond the latest Vejas. Shame on us. We used to rule the world in buttoned-up businesswear that inspired confidence and, yes, respect. Now we can’t be bothered. Would James Bond seem quite so dashing, invincible, and quintessentially British wearing joggers and a pair of Yeezy Belugas? No, he most certainly would not.

Analysts at Kiwi attribute the demise of smart shoes to lockdown and the cultish new insistence on working from home that has sprung up in its wake. After all, who wears brogues to their garden shed office? Apart from Jacob Rees-Mogg.

But the vogue for dressing down goes deeper than convenience. It is the sloppy, outward manifestation of a rather arrogant mindset; namely that the established rules do not apply to those who are terribly special. It also bespeaks a juvenile refusal to conform, underlined by the woefully mistaken belief that athleisure is anti-ageing and (brace yourself) cool. Who can unsee the nightmarish picture of Rishi Sunak tapping into Gen Z’s favourite socks and sliders trend as he prepared his 2021 Budget?

Or what about Liz Truss (British prime minister from September 6 2022 to October 25 2022) turning up at the Conservative Party’s annual conference in a pair of white Reiss trainers as though she’d never heard of Next Forever Comfort loafers? Like almost everything else about her brief car-crash premiership, the optics were horrendous.

By way of context: we lost the ultimate emblem of Britishness last year, our beloved late Queen and Sovereign. The consensus was rightly that she never put a foot wrong, which was not unconnected to the fact she always dressed accordingly. Her outfits projected dignity, authority and a recognition that, in order to be taken seriously, one must look the part. Those who represent us would do well to take note; not just parliamentarians and bureaucrats but people in business, industry and beyond. Dressing with care is not merely a courtesy, it is an index of self respect.

The nose-thumbing casualness of dress-down Britain represents the precise opposite. It is an act of disrespect that tells everyone, whether in the office or at an international summit, that we don’t value ourselves. It might work for the filthy-rich Silicon Valley executive trying to appear “normal” – but given the economic woes that beset us, surely a more business-like approach ought to be imperative. Proper polished shoes, please.

Traditional, yes. Stuffy? Only to inverted snobs (although they are very much in the ascendant, I fear). There’s no denying that the ripped jeans-and-hoodie generation regards tailoring as the last wicked bastion of class and privilege; but no good will come of swapping snobbery for slobbery.